Learn to call upon the resolute mindset
Though we don’t always realize it, we have many options in any given situation as far as the frame of mind we use to approach it. Everyone has their natural tendencies that they reach for first, and sometimes those instincts are a good fit for the situation at hand. At other times, adopting a different mindset may be more appropriate. Learning about and gaining comfort in a variety of mindsets allows you to expand your EQ range and navigate your day with agility.
Resolute is one of the eight Agile EQ mindsets. If it is one of yours, learn more about it in Your resolute mindset in Agile EQ. If not, here’s some guidance on building your emotional intelligence muscles by practicing resolve.
But first: Why do it? And when?
Why do it?
Calling upon the resolute mindset when appropriate has benefits for people of different DiSC® styles. If you are an i style or S style, you may be tempted to yield to others in tense situations, even if you know you’re right, or you feel strongly about an issue. Your instincts are telling you that backing down will help maintain relationships or restore harmony. But your views matter as much as anyone else’s. You owe it to your ideas and beliefs to speak up, even if it is uncomfortable for you.
Being resolute when it is needed doesn’t just benefit you, but your team as well. Doing so can
- prevent small issues from ballooning into something bigger
- help stave off the resentment of the unheard
- ensure things get done the right way
- contribute to healthy team dynamics and balanced power
In addition, projecting confidence and clarity is a gift you can give anxious coworkers in high-stress times.
Situations that may call for the resolute mindset
The “EQ” part of Everything DiSC® Agile EQ™ is about increasing your skill and comfort with various mindsets, not just the ones that come most easily to you. The “agile” part of Agile EQ is the ability to read a situation and recognize which mindset is most appropriate.
For example, say you are a naturally receptive person who is pitching a new idea to your team. You’ve done your research and know it’s a good idea, but when you bring it up, your colleagues start brainstorming their own, different ideas. You might need to adapt to how the situation is progressing by choosing the resolute mindset. From this mindset, you can still agree that other viewpoints are important, but you’ll be better able to stay on message and advocate for your idea.
You may need to show resolve when
- defending your ideas
- protecting your time
- standing up to strong personalities
- initiating critical feedback
- resisting the influence of others
- preventing small issues from ballooning
- pushing toward the finish line
- fighting for change, especially when you’re in the minority
How to be more resolute
The resolute mindset can be a challenge for different reasons for the various DiSC styles. So, the approach for growing this competency should be different as well. Each Agile EQ report (see sample) is heavily personalized based on a person’s DiSC style and their effort meter for each mindset. Some S styles, for example, may not need a lot of energy to stretch into the resolute mindset (i.e., their effort meter is green in their Agile EQ profile), but for others with the exact same placement on the DiSC model, it may take a great deal of effort. Agile EQ has customized goals and action steps for each learner.
Recognize your thoughts
Becoming more resolute starts with identifying and overcoming thoughts like:
- I don’t want to appear rude or selfish.
- If I give in, things can go back to normal.
- I’m not going to fight this because I want to be a team player.
- It’s not worth delaying things to address this.
- I’m sure this will work out fine.
- It’s not worth rocking the boat.
Set goals
The next step is to set goals. The Agile EQ report lays out beginner, intermediate, and advanced goals for each respondent. The desired results may be things like:
- I stand behind my opinions, even if others disagree.
- When appropriate, I know how to be stubborn without threatening my relationships.
- I’m fairly willing to say no to extra tasks when my to-do list is full.
- In most meetings, I tend to believe I’m as capable as anyone else there.
Start practicing
How do you get there? The Agile EQ report has concrete action steps for each level. Like any skill, it gets easier with practice. Some general tips for being more resolute:
- Be OK with disagreement. Let yourself hover in that uneasy space.
- Don’t change your position just because someone else is telling you or you want to escape tension, even though changing it might still happen.
- Stay on message.
- Stand behind your opinions, even the unpopular ones.
- Speak up about problems, even if it costs time and causes discomfort.
- Discover the value of a little stubbornness.
- Challenge undermining thoughts that make you question your competence and abilities.
Showing resolve—when it is appropriate—may be quite uncomfortable to you at first. Mindsets don’t change overnight, but you’ll likely be surprised at how practicing even small steps toward becoming more resolute will influence your interactions. Simply knowing that there are choices beyond your default response—even if they are difficult for you—opens up new possibilities that can be very empowering.
See also: Your Resolute mindset in Agile EQ